Inner Healing - Prayer for self

As I still the wheels of my thoughts, I now put all my attention on spending this time with the Lord. This time with the Lord is very important because I am going to open myself up to him like I have never done with any body in my life.
I know my Lord knows everything and has been knocking on the door all the time. I now choose to open the door and let him enter my heart, mind and soul. Every part of me welcomes him............
He enters with his light. I can feel...... as though I am being flooded with light.............

I sing "Pour out your Spirit, Pour out your Spirit on me. Pour out your spirit, Pour out your spirit on me. Spirit move in your temple...... Spirit move in my life.......Spirit move..... I am calling.. Spirit heal........I am asking. Spirit fill me with your love........ I need you....... Pour out your healing, Pour out your healing. Pour out your healing on me. I am pleading......

I can feel you all around me Lord.... I can smell your fragrance..... the sweet fragrance of the Lilies of the valley with the morning dew on them fills me.........

I will now walk with you Lord, I will hold onto your rod and staff for comfort.
 I now walk with the lord as he leads me to those areas of my life that need his soothing touch. I begin my journey as I feel the power of his love sending me into a house.......... of my earthly parents.
My beginnings on this earth.....



As, I grow in silence, the Lord reveals to me the circumstances of my birth.
He reveals to me how I was conceived - a moment of joy/love/peace/lust/anger/etc.
This moment is of pain/joy/fear/sadness for my mother......
Maybe she was very young or not yet ready to have me. Maybe she was very tired and felt pushed into being intimate......Maybe she was full of fear... Maybe she was yet not free of the grief of separating from her parents..... Maybe she felt intimidated by her in laws...... Maybe she did not want to marry my father/or was in love with someone else etc.
Maybe my Father was very young or old, short tempered, lacked understanding, etc. Maybe he did not marry my mother out of free will or was into pornography, or was abused as a child......

All these feelings My Mother felt at that time...... she kept it to herself and this got passed onto me as anger, fear, pain, rejection when I was still a tiny egg inside of her.

I ask the Lord to pour out his spirit and heal me........... I ask him to set me free from this anger, fear or feelings of inadequacy....

I feel the Lord pouring his Light and Love in this area of my life. That moment of me being breathed into the body of my mother is now infused with white Light. I can feel the Lord himself present at the time of my creation....... I can feel his white light flowing around me.......

As, I  focus more on this white light it becomes intense and surrounds me and fills me with immeasurable peace and I feel a lightness like I have never felt. I call out to my Lord in a moment of ecstasy claiming there is healing in your name Lord, there is Joy in being with you.......

You, O, Lord are with me.......... Your rod and staff comfort me...

I now release any feelings of pain connected with my conception towards my Mother and my Father completely. I let it dissolve in the purity of his Light.
                     I release all my pent up feelings, and look with the eyes of my Saviour and feel the same surge of Love towards them that my Lord feels for them.......
    I surround them and me with the blood and water that gushed out from the side of the Lord. I place myself in his ever open arms on the cross.